woo first post woo

So. Here I am. Yes, blogging. And yes, not on myspace or facebook. Woo.

I am currently undergoing polarity therapy and my lovely therapist, Suzi Wilcoff, recommended I start writing down my feelings whenever I feel blocked or anxious. And I hate hand writing anything...so here I am. Now, let's be clear about these polarity treatments... I am not paying for them. If I were, I would not be going. Not that they aren't helpful - they are incredibly relaxing and cleansing - but I just can't afford shit like this when I could get acupuncture or counselling on my insurance for far cheaper. Alas, it is not I who pays for these sessions, it is the CXO of my company. She's worried about my stress levels and struggles with asthma-like symptoms lately, and gave me four sessions as a gift. Two sessions down now, two to go. And yes, I like it a lot. Not as much as I like the herbal tea Suzi gave me to make at home, but almost as much. And no, I'm not a hippie, new age-ist or any sort of guru following gal. I just like the intimacy of bonding with a complete yet sensitive stranger over my day's woes and getting a massage while we're talking. And did I mention that it's free?

Struggling a lot lately with figuring out my future. Not my long term forever future - I pretty much know where I want that to lead - but the short term what-do-i-do-until-i-move-to-England future. Work sucks. My family vacillates between annoying me and amusing me on a weekly basis. Me and my friends aren't as down depressed and desperate as we all used to be, so we don't spend 3-4 nights a week together anymore. And I have options. Lots of them. Yet I feel completely paralyzed sometimes, like I couldn't walk three feet to my front door let alone handle making a complete life change over the next few months. And I am waiting on a job offer from a past employer in the UK, incredibly incredibly impatiently.

All that sad, I am happy. I'm in love, I'm sure about what I want - more than ever before- and I definitely can't wait to get out of this allergen-infested State as soon as I can. By the way, I can't take my allergy medicine for the next two days because I have testing on Thursday. Which is horrid because the ugly guy on the news just said this week is going to be absolutely killer on allergy sufferers because of hot stagnant weather. Blech.

Later peeps. Gonna drink my herbal tea and force sleep upon my busy mind.


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